On my recent stay with friends who live in a suburb outside Philadelphia I was impressed with the number and depth of their friendships. I saw Christian community like I haven't seen since I was in college. We had dinner with their friends on Saturday night, a group of eight came to their home for Bible Study on Sunday night, and on Monday night three of the people in their study came over for dinner. Some gut wrenching sharing of deeply personal issues followed by prayer ensued after dinner.
Wow They enjoyed relationships marked by authentic sharing, real listening, and prayer three nights in a row Radical. Closest thing to the Acts 2 community I've seen among real adults, not the kind that live in dorms and can walk five minutes to reach a friend. I'd like to have that.
How did this happen? This couple both grew up in California and moved to Pennsylvania some twenty years ago. They tell me that in their area people don't like to drive far. They consider going to the next state, though it's just two hours away, a very long distance. Going into Philadelphia, a 30-minute drive, is also a big trip.
This couple's church draws people from their geographical community. Not like mine which has people from 30 miles north of it and 30 miles south and from across a bridge. We apparently don't consider driving a big deal.
In this couple's group is a single woman who lives down the street. Other members and friends are relatively close too. This helps people to have unstructured time together, conversation that wasn't first planned and entered into a day-timer. When living close we can run into someone in a store or bop down the street with a basket of freshly picked apples to share and then chat.
I learned tonight that most Americans live isolated lives, but aren't aware of it. We don't realize that the anxiety - rather low levels or high - and the depression we feel come from lack of community. Our health suffers from our lack of relationships and then we go jogging or go see a doctor rather than look for what we need. Much of our culture so prizes individuality and achievements that we think stress is something we get rid of by working on ourselves. It doesn't occur to us that we need relationships to help us thrive.
More on this later. I need to practice some community here at home. I came home thirty minutes ago from a conference on small groups and haven't done much more than greet, smile at, kiss and hug my husband.
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